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There are thousands of children in Maryland who at first glance do not appear to have special needs. They're in good health. They're keeping up with their peers. But something terrible has happened to them|. They have been neglected or abused by the adults in their lives, and that abuse can have a life-long emotional impact on their lives.

In Maryland, child abuse is defined as the physical or mental injury of a child by a parent, caregiver, or family member. Neglect occurs when a child isn’t given proper care or
attention.

According to recent data, there were 31,501 reported cases of child abuse and neglect statewide in 2005. Johns Hopkins University records indicate that around 500 children who are suspected of being abused visit the Pediatric Emergency Department at the Johns Hopkins Children's Center each year.

One agency that is working hard to prevent abuse and neglect in Maryland by reaching out to at-risk parents is The Family Tree. And one way the Baltimore-based agency does this is through its three-month long Positive Parenting Program. Half the participants attend by order of the courts and protective services; others are referred by parents who have been through the program and liked what they’ve learned.

“They may not be thrilled to come the first time, but you see the turn in their attitude,” says Mary Francioli, director of development for The Family Tree.  “Literally, physically, some of their bodies turn,” adds Patricia Cronin, LCSW-C, executive director of Family Tree. “They don’t want to be here. Then they’re like, ‘Wow, it’s working. It’s helping.’ Then it’s a place they look forward to coming to.”

When they first attend Positive Parenting, most parents expect the facilitator to tell them that they are terrible people who do everything wrong. But that’s not what happens.  “And by virtue of not telling them, but by leading them through a process of understanding themselves, what makes them tick, what do they need as parents… they begin to break down the barriers… and they realize that we’re not here to tell them what to do,” Cronin says.

In fact, the first three sessions are devoted to helping parents understand themselves, and only then does the program delve into child development.  “They don’t know. They think a kid should be potty trained at 2. If they’re not, they should be whacked. They think a 12-year-old should do what they’re told all the time, because that’s what they did, and if they didn’t get it, they got the switch,” says Cronin and Francioli.

In general, parents raise their children the way they were raised. Since statistics show that children who were abused often become abusers themselves, the Positive Parenting Program guides parents down a different path.

Participants can try out new behaviors at home and report back to the group about whether or not the strategies worked. Since research shows that abusive or neglectful families tend to be isolated, without a lot of support from family or friends, talking with each other and building relationships with other parents is another important part of the program.

At the Baltimore headquarters, while the parents meet in the conference room, their kids enjoy The Family Tree’s cheerful playroom, where the staff teaches them to problem solve and practice important social skills, such as waiting their turn.

“They’re having a blast, having a good old time, but it is curriculum-based. So they don’t even notice—but they’re learning!” says Francioli.

Help Is Here
Child abuse and neglect carries a huge stigma. The Family Tree believes if it were less shameful to seek help, more at-risk families would come forward.

“The idea was a public health model,” Cronin explains. “Position yourself so you can reach everyone, and everyone will have access to you. Because that’s the way you have the greatest effect for families that need you the most. I think The Family Tree, hopefully once we’re known really well, is seen as an agency that can help people who are struggling with issues around parenting… and what parent doesn’t [have issues]? It won’t be as hard. If you come in the door, it won’t be ‘My God, I’m coming in the door because I’m beating my kids.’”

In addition to its Baltimore headquarters, The Family Tree has offices in Harford, Howard, Prince George’s and Anne Arundel Counties. The Family Tree also reaches out to families in homeless shelters. It boasts 300 active volunteers.

Taking the public health model further, Cronin dreams about the day when support is available to every new mom in Maryland.   “Whether it’s someone coming to the home to make sure the baby is nursing properly and not losing weight, to more intensive support if necessary,” she says. “In Europe, a nurse comes to everyone’s house to check on the newborn. Here it’s stigmatized, and we want to change that.”

Child abuse and neglect have a long-term impact. Research shows that abused children may get involved in the juvenile justice system or the adult courts. They are a burden on health care and don’t contribute to society as much as they could.  The Family Tree believes that getting help doesn’t mean you’re a loser.

It’s a sign of strength, Cronin notes, explaining that The Family Tree’s goal is to get in front of the issue, to re-frame the idea of intervention so that going for help isn’t a stigma, but a positive move to improve your life and your children’s lives, too. BC

Contact The Family Tree
If you need someone to talk to right now about child abuse or neglect, call The Family Tree StressLine at 800-243-7337.
To learn more about The Family Tree, go to www.familytreemd.org or call 410-889-2300.

© Baltimore’s Child Inc. August 2007